The O.J. Simpson trial

Jurors in the O.J. Simpson trial heard this tape last week which was secretly recorded by Henry Beardsly, the plantiff in the case, who alledges Simpson broke into his Las Vegas hotel last Spring with a gun in order to take back memorphibila Simpson claims was stolen from him.

Beardsley: Yo, O.J. 

O.J.: Man, what you doing with my stuff?

Beardsley: What stuff?

O.J.: Look man, that’s my stuff. 

Beardsley: I don’t know what your talking about. Besides you ain’t asking nicely

O.J.: Come on, please? It’s right there.

Beardsley: Please, what?

O.J.: Can I pretty please have my stuff back?

Beardsley: With a cherry?

O.J.: Can I pretty please with a cherry on top have my things back?

Beardsley: Ok. I’ll think about it.

O.J.: Really?

Beardsley: Na, you can’t have it

[note: sniffles are heard]

O.J.: Pleeeeeeease?

[note: a door opens]

Beardsley: Hey! If it isn’t the chauffeur! What you doing here?

O.J.: Please. No, A.C. He’ll give it back.

Cowlings: You fool.

Beardsley: What’s that bag for?

[sound: a zipper]

Beardsley: What the hell is that?

Cowlings: Blood. 

Beardsley: You got a bag of blood?

Cowlings: Cop blood. He works in Vegas.

Beardsley: Man, what the HELL??!! Stop pouring that out!

O.J.: I can’t stop him

Beardsley: What are you doing??!!

Cowlings: Corrupting the crime scene. 

Beardsley: What crime scene?

Cowlings: This crime scene. [sound of a gun cocking]

[sound of crying]

Cowlings: O.J. shut the hell up.

Beardsley: Ok, ok, ok. Listen. Okay, here’s your things man. 

O.J.: [sniffing] Ooookay.


[End of Tape]


(P.S.: Just so you know: I made this up. Don’t sue me, k?)

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